The terrible, horrible, no good, very bad day

You know, some days, you really should just stay in bed.  Today would have been one of those days.  The first thing my sleepy little foot touched this morning, when getting out of bed, was a gigantic fresh hairball, provided by our ever accomodating cat.  After cleaning the warm goo from between my toes, EWWW, I head down the hallway to free the little moster that is my son.  Apparently, daddy didn't put pants on him last night after his bath, only a shirt and diaper.  Having free access to the diaper tabs, he found it necessary to take off his diaper, which coincidently had a rather large turd in it.  Well, that turd must have been the best toy he had in that room, because he was quick to run up to me and show me his new play thing.  Again, EWW!!  So off to the bath.  After bath time, we head to the kitchen, where I'm guessing someone (Rick) left the freezer open which in turn melted the ice cream which at some point leaked all over the freezer and then onto the floor.  Luckily, the dog was up to the challenge and had decided to lick it all up.  Unluckily, I think the dog may be lactose intolerant, as he also puked  up the ice cream, along with some not very well chewed dog chow.  Then upon taking himout to do his business, he had diarrhea on the back steps.  Say it with me.  EWWWW!!!  I think I'll take the rest of the day off now.  Who wants to cover for me?  Anyone?  Anyone?