Stories from the Emergency Clinic

Working in the emergency clinic, we were used to getting frantic phone calls from pet owners, describing terrible accidents in scant details before we told them to rush right over. From car accidents to animal fights and everything inbetween. We saw it all.

It was a slow afternoon, and when the phone rang we were actually looking foward to doing something, wrapping our brains around a crisis and solving the problem. The receptionist answered the phone, and I could hear the frantic voice on the other line desperatly trying to describe what had happened to his dog. I didn't catch all the details, but was filled in as Tammy hung up the phone.

"They've got a young dog who they think may have an exposed hernia or was in some sort of dog fight or car accident that left a hole big and deep enough for intestines to pop out."

This sounded serious, and so everyone prepared for the worst and waited for the dog to arrive.

Ten minutes later, a car pulled up and out came a young couple in their twenties carrying a young Jack Russel. The dog was smiling and looking around as the young man carried him wrapped in a blanket to the door. Uncharacteristicly stoic for a hurt Jack Russel, I thought to myself.

As they hurried in, the girl said that they had just called about the possible hernia or dog fight and so I rushed them into a room to examine the dog.

Upon removing the blanket, I expected a pool of blood, and had gauze to apply pressure where needed. No blood. There was no protruding guts, no sign of injury at all.

Quizzically, I looked at the owners expecting some explanation as the woman sat in the corner and wiped tears from her eyes. "I don't understand," I said, "Where is he hurt? I don't see any sign of injury at all."

The man took a deep gulp and replied, "Its awful, it came out of there," he pointed to the dog's penis. "We don't know if he was hit by a car or what, but it looked like intestines or something falling out."

The little dog wagged his butt as I patted his head and smiled.

"I think what you saw was his penis," I say to them.

"Oh no! You don't understand. This looked like guts."

"Well, they aren't pretty, if thats what you mean," I replied.

They were unconvinced, so the doctor came in to examine the poor dog. After a few minutes, he was able to get the dog's penis to peek out a bit, causing the woman to cry again and the man to look away in disgust, thinking he was looking at some major injury jutting out of his dog.

"What you saw," the doctor explained," was Henry's first erection. He was probably overexcited. He is perfectly fine though."

The man looked again at the protruding blob and made a horrible face at the realization of what he had witnessed. The woman stopped crying and turned a bright shade of red.

"So, Henry is okay?" she asked.

"Henry is perfectly fine," the doctor assured her.

They scooped the dog up in his blanket and made a very calm and quiet exit, relieved that Henry would live to see another day.