Fan mail!

Boy howdy, do I get some interesting fan mail from you guys! Most common of them all being wedding proposals. Ummm...How do I say this nicely? I'm taken. Notice that I am The Good WIFE. You see, I already have a husband. I call him Rick on this blog. I think I may have mentioned him once or twice. Sorry. But thanks?

Today I got an email worthy of sharing. Its odd to say the least, as it has to do with a fetish. Not a normal fetish. (Is there such a thing?) Anyway, read on:

Hi Wife,

May I call you that? Or maybe you would like to email me you real name, so that we may address each other respectfully. Its rude not sharing your name with your fans. I'm a big fan. ;-} You have something I want, and I am willing to pay you for it. I can tell by you body dat you probly eat well, sesibly. That makes for yummy prizes that is what i want from you. I would like to send you a container in a well sealed box for you to deposit sum urine in for me to have. You think its wierd? But its not. Its good for you, and pretty girls make the best. How much do you charge? I will pay most anything for urine of yours. I can almost smell it now. Here is my phone number and adress and you can give me your address to send you the box. ok?

Love you alot!!!! ;-}

Melvin

That is a real email, I kid you not. By asking how much I charge, he implies I've spoken of selling my urine before. I'm pretty sure I haven't. Melvin, baby, you are creepy. Blech. "No pee for you!" (imagine me saying that like the soup nazi from Seinfeld. funny, right?lol)

So, be forewarned, if you send creepy email, you may just get publicly embarrased. Or excited, depending on your fetish, I suppose. Just don't do it! Oh, and Melvin? Yeah, I won't be sharing my real name either. Sorry about that, bud. But if anyone is in the market for selling their pee, I know just the guy to call!