To shave or not to shave.....
Speaking with a girlfriend the other day, the mention of ob gyns came up. She made the comment that she'd have to postpone her yearly exam for at least a month or two because she had recently shaved herself bare for her boyfriend.
I'm always perplexed when I hear this sort of response. Are you to tell me that a doctor who specializes in pussys has never seen one bare? Or that they give a crap either way how you maintain yourself, so long as you're clean? Please, I think they have better things to do in their life than to be shocked and amazed at such things.
I like to be clean shaven, and have absolutely no problem with letting my doctor see that. Not once has she ever made comment on my grooming, nor has she gasped at the presentation of naked skin.
Granted, keeping up the bare snatch will prove impossible in several months when I can no longer see what I'm doing, but then I can still at least be well groomed. If only Rick could be convinced to take up the chore.....
Don't not shave for the sake of your doctor. Please. Its just silly.
Stories from the Emergency Clinic
Working in the emergency clinic, we were used to getting frantic phone calls from pet owners, describing terrible accidents in scant details before we told them to rush right over. From car accidents to animal fights and everything inbetween. We saw it all.
It was a slow afternoon, and when the phone rang we were actually looking foward to doing something, wrapping our brains around a crisis and solving the problem. The receptionist answered the phone, and I could hear the frantic voice on the other line desperatly trying to describe what had happened to his dog. I didn't catch all the details, but was filled in as Tammy hung up the phone.
"They've got a young dog who they think may have an exposed hernia or was in some sort of dog fight or car accident that left a hole big and deep enough for intestines to pop out."
This sounded serious, and so everyone prepared for the worst and waited for the dog to arrive.
Ten minutes later, a car pulled up and out came a young couple in their twenties carrying a young Jack Russel. The dog was smiling and looking around as the young man carried him wrapped in a blanket to the door. Uncharacteristicly stoic for a hurt Jack Russel, I thought to myself.
As they hurried in, the girl said that they had just called about the possible hernia or dog fight and so I rushed them into a room to examine the dog.
Upon removing the blanket, I expected a pool of blood, and had gauze to apply pressure where needed. No blood. There was no protruding guts, no sign of injury at all.
Quizzically, I looked at the owners expecting some explanation as the woman sat in the corner and wiped tears from her eyes. "I don't understand," I said, "Where is he hurt? I don't see any sign of injury at all."
The man took a deep gulp and replied, "Its awful, it came out of there," he pointed to the dog's penis. "We don't know if he was hit by a car or what, but it looked like intestines or something falling out."
The little dog wagged his butt as I patted his head and smiled.
"I think what you saw was his penis," I say to them.
"Oh no! You don't understand. This looked like guts."
"Well, they aren't pretty, if thats what you mean," I replied.
They were unconvinced, so the doctor came in to examine the poor dog. After a few minutes, he was able to get the dog's penis to peek out a bit, causing the woman to cry again and the man to look away in disgust, thinking he was looking at some major injury jutting out of his dog.
"What you saw," the doctor explained," was Henry's first erection. He was probably overexcited. He is perfectly fine though."
The man looked again at the protruding blob and made a horrible face at the realization of what he had witnessed. The woman stopped crying and turned a bright shade of red.
"So, Henry is okay?" she asked.
"Henry is perfectly fine," the doctor assured her.
They scooped the dog up in his blanket and made a very calm and quiet exit, relieved that Henry would live to see another day.
Nocturnal Orgasms
I know I've talked about it quite a few times before, and I've grown curious as to why such a thing happens and how common it really is.
The last three nights in a row, I've had very vivid erotic dreams that end with me waking up and experiencing an intense orgasm. More intense even than those acquired through intercourse or other intimate means with Rick or even through masturbation. Friday night's dream brought on such a powerful climax, that I had abdominal cramps for a few minutes, something I've been assured is normal and completely unharmful to the little peanut in my tummy.
Anyway, I found it interesting that the first several searches I came across, mostly religious it would seem, blamed the phenomenon on the devil or demons.
Medieval theologians posited the existence of "incubi," demons who had intercourse with women while they slept (the "succubus" is the equivalent for males). Witches claimed to have had intercourse with the devil in this way, and were sometimes put to death on account of it--a grim indication of the depth of male paranoia regarding female sexual response.
One site with a resident "Dr" noted that nocturnal orgasms are caused when the 'epicenter' or female prostate is compressed perhaps by a tilted uterus during sleep. I don't have a tilted uterus, and these dreams occur in several different sleep positions which would seem to cancel out some sort of compression or other disorder causing the contractions.
Another study suggested that the person experiencing the 'wet dreams' was fufilling through sleep what they were neglected in their sex life. This is laughable to me, at least in my situation.
Isn't it possible that nocturnal orgasms are simply caused by a vivid imagination and the ability to turn yourself on? A simple sexual release, rather than some sort of odd disorder? I enjoy these dreams very much, and have never felt that they were an illness or some sign of sexual frustrations.
Its certainly a nice way to start the day.
Tell me....
While parking late at night, you slightly scrape the side of a Porsche. You are certain no one else is aware of what happened. The damage is minor and would not be covered by insurance. Would you leave a note?
Drama
One of my girlfriends is notorious for going ridiculous amounts of time with no contact whatsoever, and then calling with a major life crisis. Basically, she calls when she needs/wants something.
After nearly two years of not hearing from Alicia, she called to tell me she was getting married and invited me to attend her wedding, two days from the phone call. My mother was in the hospital, and I had a new baby to care for, so the short notice wasn't enough for me to attend.
We soon met her husband, Aaron, and he got along really well with Rick, so I tried very hard to try and keep her in my life by going out and doing things together. This was fine for a short time, but soon she fell back into old habits and I didn't hear from her again except for the occasional fowarded email chain letter, etc.
Nearly seven months from hearing from her last, she called me one day last week leaving this message on my machine, "Hi GW, its me. I just wanted to call and talk to you for a few minutes, since I probably won't be able to talk to you again for a really really long time. I'm getting divorced and moving out of state. Call me."
What?!
Upon calling, I come to find out that she and Aaron had been having a really tough time together, and that she felt she was just his whore, that he wanted her for sex alone. They fought constantly, and she had decided to move out on New Years Eve.
Two days before, she was having a heart to heart with Aaron, trying to work things out. She sipped from a soda as they talked, and then went downstairs to smoke a cigarette with Aaron's friend, sipping from the same soda. Soon, she says her feet started to feel numb, and that the sensation was going up her legs and rendered her unable to move. Aaron's friend laid her down on a couch in the basement, covered her with a blanket and kissed her forehead, telling her everything would be okay before heading upstairs.
She heard yelling upstairs, and then Aaron stomped down the steps, dragging her upstairs and laying her across his lap as he sat on the couch.
"Are you okay," he asked. She told him that she felt sick, and he fed her some crackers as she got more and more drowsy.
Next thing she knew, he was having sex with her. She couldn't move and soon blacked out, unable to recall what happened next.
It would appear that something was slipped into her drink, whether it was Aaron or his friend, she doesn't know. Regardless, she was taken advantage of, is filing for divorce, and moving out of state. Drastic measures, but nothing she ever does is small.
I don't know what to think. Alicia drinks alot of alcohol, and it doesn't seem impossible that maybe things didn't quite happen as she described. That sounds awful to say, and I still have great distaste for Aaron, as he clearly hadn't been treating her as he should regardless. And of course, I was supportive in everyway I could be for Alicia, offering any help she may need. But I can't help but wonder how much she told me is solid truth and how much could be imagined.
Anyway, I have a Christmas gift that I hadn't been able to give her yet that she doesn't seem to be needing anymore. Its a personalized photo flip engraved with their family name, The Morrisons. I can't return it, obviously, so I wondered if any of my readers shared that last name and may be interested in it. If so, drop me a line at goodwife@gmail.com.
I don't know when I'll hear from Alicia again, although I'm sure it will be something exciting when I do. It always is. Shes sworn off men for the moment, understandably.
Broadband Phone Service
Rick and I are looking into broadband phone services, namely Vonage. I was hoping that perhaps some of you may have experience with such things and would be able to give advice and tell me how you liked or didn't like it. Any info is appreciated, thanks!
xoxo
Because I love you guys....
Happy Hump Day
Guilty Pleasure
**************
"What the hell am I doing?" Finn asked herself this question with a slow cold realization. What triggered her senses? Was it the unlit road they had just turned on? Was it when the doors locked loudly from the driver's controls? Or was it when she slipped into the leather seat of the Lincoln with the man whose name she did not know?
She was not the sort of girl to do such things. Always she had kept a tight line on her passions. Just this once, she had told herself. Just this one she wanted to see what it would be like to give in to the ideas that raced into her head when she fantasized.
He was a stranger to her, much older than Finn. She had met him when her car had broken down on the side of the road. He was tall and tanned from work outside or perhaps it was play. His green eyes had danced with mischief when he leaned across his steering wheel and offered help. He wore a suit, but she could tell he would rather have been in something else, his tie was twisted loosely against his throat. His hair had a taste of gray at the temples and there were laugh lines at his eyes and lips.
At the time, all Finn could feel was relief for the help. She was 23, alone, and driving a long way in the middle of the night. She had just broke up with her boyfriend. She needed to drive to clear her head. She had gotten in the car, still wearing the short black skirt and small white blouse from her catering gig as a cocktail waitress. She had ditched the panty hose, leaving only her black lace thong underneath and the white lace bra that pushed her large breast into firm attention. The spiked hills were hanging from the garment hook in the back seat by their straps along with her small apron.
She never noticed the check engine light. She was too busy pulling up her long brown hair with a clip and trying to light a cigarette with her shaky hands. One knee steered the car the other gunning the gas on the little blue convertible.
A hand touched her knee.
Finn stopped thinking and let reality set in. She was in this man's car.
"Thanks so much for your help," she had said when he lowered the hood with the convertible purring yet again.
He had smiled at her and looked her up and down in his headlights.
"I don't know how to repay you," she had added while he stared.
"I have some ideas," he had smiled.
Now his hand was on her knee, his large fingers squeezing the flesh on the inside of the knee moving up the thigh. A tingling starting in her stomach. Fear mixed in with arousal, her body was so alert she couldn't decide which was coming over her. Her teeth clenched together but she could feel her panties getting wet.
They had made an agreement for the evening. No words had been spoken since. No words were really spoken at all, after his suggestion of an idea. Finn had slid into the car as if in a haze, never saying a word.
He gripped her thigh and jerked it towards him, her legs opening wide. His fingers digging into her inner thigh moving up to her center. He never took his eyes from the road or his other hand off the wheel.
His fingers pulled at the waist of her panties pulling them down in a rough manner until his callused hand was touching the sensitive shaved skin. Two fingers pressing into her moistening slit and moving directly for the prize, her tight hole.
Both fingers slipped in, curling inside of Finn. She stiffened her body against the intrusion, but was stopped from clamping her legs together by the hand still in her pussy jerking hard into her thigh.
The two fingers began moving inside of her while his thumb found her clit and began to rub against it. Finn closed her eyes. At first she was scared and whimpering like a puppy. After a few strokes of his thumb she found her legs relaxing more, her body needing what she did not understand.
She heard a cell phone begin to dial, then the man's voice, "John, hey it's me. I'm going to be out at the location this evening if you want to get some overtime hours this evening."
Finn froze in horror. They had agreed no one would know. "Whose John?"
The man squeezed her pussy lips with his hand moving to pinch her clip between two fingers. "A friend, a little added insurance to make sure things go smoothly."
"We said no one would know," she said firmly. She pushed at his hand under her skirt.
"No, you said you didn't want anyone to know. I never said that I felt the same way."
He reached for her neck and began to stroke it with his hand. His smile soft on the mouth but hard around the eyes. A street light became clear in the distance, and he pulled her head down towards his lap as they neared it. Finn had her face forced down into his lap as the car slowed. He pressed her face into his crotch, making his growing arousal press against her cheek.
A gate creaked open and the car turned onto gravel. Holding her head firmly, he pressed Finn's face against his crotch, moving his hips to thrust against her slowly, his length growing.
The car stopped. Finn could hear saws and equipment in the background. Her head was released and she looked up to see a site under construction lit by floodlights. There had to be about ten men working on the half-built house.
The man took her by the hand and pulled her out of the car on his side. Putting a hand up her skirt in the back, and cupping one rounded ass cheek, he guided her the few steps to a small portable metal office whose door faced away from the construction site. Finn noticed a truck parked behind it, there was a light on inside.
The construction sounds were muffled once inside the office. Inside was a water cooler between two metal chairs. A desk stood a few feet away with various blue prints and things, with a long computer table behind it.
In one of the metal chairs, sat a younger man. In his early 30's if she had to guess. Shorter than his friend, but leaner and with sharper features.
"I see you've been helping strangers again, Frank," the man in the chair replied. He looked Finn up and down and smiled.
Frank was all business and gave no return smile. He quickly turned out the light John had left on, plunging the trailer into a gray light coming from the two small windows. The room took on a light silvery glow.
He stepped in front of Finn and held her face between his fingers, pinching her chin. The other hand pulled down her hair, making it fall around her shoulders. His hands went to her shirt next, unbuttoning the first button, then ripping the rest away. Buttons clattered to the floor as Finn's back was pressed the wall nearest John.
Hands were immediately on her breasts, pinching at her nipples through the bra. Finn held her breath until her chest ached, let it out and did this again. She was so afraid of what the two of them were doing, but so excited at going along with this act that she couldn't think straight. Just once, she thought, I want to know what it would be like to give in.
Frank pressed his thigh between her legs and jerked up hard, making her straddle his thigh on her toes. He bit her neck below the ear. "He likes to watch, baby, I knew you wouldn't mind." His hand moved under her skirt and began massaging her wet pussy as she squirmed against the wall. Fingers dragged the material of her panties to the side and he took her on his hand again. "You don't mind do you." his voice was almost a sneer.
Finn leaned against the wall like a rag doll, "uh huh," she breathed out, not recognizing her own voice.
Frank smiles, "good," his hand fucking her pussy faster, two fingers now three, jabbing in and out of her hard, "that's my little girl." He wrapped a hand in her hair, and brought her down to her knees in front of him.
Finn hit the floor of the office with a thud, her face pressed into his crotch. This time both hands were holding her head against his pants. "Take it out," he ordered.
Finn undid his belt; opening the khakis and letting them fall to the floor. He wasn't wearing underwear and his cock jerked out hard against her cheek. Growling, he pulled her head back with hands in her hair and guided her mouth towards himself. "Now suck," he commanded in a low hard tone.
Finn opened her mouth slowly, then forced herself not to gag, when he rammed his cock home into her throat at the slightest opening of her mouth. He held her head then, with her throat muscles contrasting to the length of him. Finn held on to his thighs for support as he thrust her head with his own hands up and down his cock. He kept himself deep in her throat, never pulling out far enough to allow her to swallow.
Finn felt tears in the corners of her eyes, and a burning in her nose as she tried to breathe and not gag on the large dick being rammed into her mouth.
Frank arched his hips into her face and began thrusting hips as well as guiding her head against himself. Finn could feel John's eyes on her from the chair beside them. She could hear him opening his pants rubbing himself. It excited her, and made her ashamed of this feeling at the same time.
Frank's breathing was getting heavier, his hands in her hair pulling harder in her reddish brown locks. Suddenly, he pulled himself from Finn's mouth.
Finn gasped and coughed from being released, but did not have a long moment to rest. Frank pulled her up by the same grip of hair until she was standing nose to chin to him. He led her to the desk and bent her over the side. Office materials clattered around her as her upper body was pressed into the top of the desk. Her ass was exposed over the edge, and she felt her legs being opened wide apart. Frank held a hand hard against the small of her back, pinning her there. John came around to face her head and pulled her hands across. He took out a pair of handcuffs and chained her to the bottom file drawer. Finn watched him, his cock semi erect peeking out of his open fly. She could feel her skirt being flipped up over her ass, the cold air on her cheeks.
"I won't hurt you," Frank said, "relax." At his words he snatched at her thongs, the material cutting into her crotch then ripping away. His hands following close behind, probing at her wet pussy, pulling back the flesh.
Finn felt her knees weaken as he kneaded her clit with both hands spreading out her pussy lips from either side. She felt his cock pressed against her ass, the hard shaft riding between her thighs.
Just as Finn was growing accustomed to her position, Frank, grabbed her hips and jerked her off balance and onto his throbbing cock. Grunting like an angry bear, he bore his weight down on her upper body and began fucking her pussy from behind so hard that the desk tried to move.
Finn couldn't help but let out a surprised moan from the swift hard cock being driven in and out with the constant gripping of his hands on her clit. She pulled against the handcuffs and tried not to think about the pain from being pressed into the desk.
Frank's growls turned into low moans as he slowed his pace replacing them with long strong strokes. John in front of Finn was stroking himself inches from her face.
Franks fingers drove home against her clit making her body tingle and ache. She formed an "Ohh" with her mouth in pleasure, and John took advantage by forcing her mouth onto him.
Finn had never felt such a sensation. Trapped in the little office, being fucked hard from behind while she sucked hungrily at the cock in front of her. With each jerk of his fingers, he made her body shake, and she sucked John readily matching her urges to the ones she was giving to the younger man.
Both moved away from her then flipped her onto her back. Finn hit the desk with a whack, and felt her wrists crossing over her head. Her head hung over the desk, the cock she had been sucking once again being pushed in.
Her legs we pulled wide apart, and wrapped over Frank's elbows. He moved again inside her, fucking her hard and fast again.
Her bra was cut off from her. She felt the knife graze her skin, but was so close to release she didn't care. Hands covered her large breasts when they sprang free, pinching the nipples in tight circles.
Frank gathered her legs up around his neck bending her body and fucking her fast. John's balls were bouncing against her nose, she could smell him, her own saliva from his cock wetting her face.
A hand went to her clit, rubbing hard and frantic. Heat filled her stomach but held out her nervous energy not allowing her to explode.
The desk rocked and shifted the men's voices low grunts backgrounded by the construction. Sensations scary, passionate, and out control filled her. As she felt Frank's thrust become harder and less rapid, her body let go.
She let out a scream against John's cock, her back arching off the desk in a massive release. John began fucking her face hard as she orgasmed, Frank pounding her fast with short strokes as she wet his shaft. Over and over she screamed her release, her body falling over the edge again and again. Frank pulled out and came against her thigh, the warmth of his cum dripping on her leg. John's dick in her mouth emptying in her throat, running out of her lips and up into her nose.
The men fell back into chairs breathing hard leaving Finn across the desk. Cum running down her leg and dripping off her nose. The blood in her head from hanging upside down making her ears ring, her body to full of pleasure to do nothing but lay relaxed.
The sounds of construction continued outside taking over the silence of the room. Finn couldn't believe she had came while letting two strange men force her into sexual acts. But truth be told, she had liked it. She pulled at the handcuffs binding her wrists to the desk.
Frank's voice breaking the silence, "Oh no, little whore, you're not finished yet."
Finn stopped pulling at her wrists. She lay exposed on the desk, listening to the men talk outside; it must have been their break. She wondered if they knew what was happening inside the office and what more she could look forward to doing. Being a slut was as much fun as she had thought.
I've been admittedly lazy in my posts recently. Pregnancy symptoms have gotten the best of me, and though its normally my way to forge ahead, not allowing such things to slow me down, this time around, the symptoms have won.
I feel icky. Often. Most of the day, actually. This interferes with how I am able to interact with my son and has dominoed into me feeling like a crappy mom for not giving him the attention I feel he deserves. Of course, its really out of my control, which I believe is what aggravates me the most.
Constantly fighting nausea has got me feeling less than sexy, and the smell of come, once such a delightful ending to a sexual encounter, now leaves me gagging and insisting on showers immediatly following come inducing activities.
Rick has been more amorous than ever, reminding me of how amorous he was during the last pregnancy. It is a pleasant memory, though I've not been able to fully enjoy the attention, what with my constant feeling of blah. Nearly every single night, hes grabbing me and fondling me, often resulting in spooning sex. Unfortunatly, I'm often praying that the jerky movements and shaking of the bed doesn't make me vomit, rather than participating in the lovefest.
If ever I felt like a lovedoll, its now. lol Do I mind? Of course not. And in my twenty minutes a day that I don't feel like crap, its what I think about. Once a nympho.....well, you know how it goes.
Thank you for all the votes and nominations! You guys are the best! xoxo 
You'd all come visit me, right? lol
He 'tricks' her into having sex with him, convinces her to let him videotape it, and then he makes her pay him too?! Interesting.
A blonde goes into a laundromat and asks to have her sweater cleaned. The laundromat attendant doesn’t hear her correctly and says, “Come again?”
The blonde blushes slightly and giggles, “Oh, no it’s just mustard this time.”
**************
A man and a woman are riding next to each other in first class on a plane. The woman sneezes, then takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs. The man isn’t sure he saw what she did, and decides he is probably hallucinating.
A few minutes pass. The woman sneezes again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs. The man is about to go nuts. He can’t believe that he’s seeing what he’s seeing.
A few more minutes pass. The woman sneezes yet again. She takes a tissue and gently wipes it between her legs yet again.
The man has finally had all he can handle. He turns to the woman and says, “Three times you’ve sneezed, and three times you’ve taken a tissue and wiped it between your legs! Are you trying to drive me crazy?”
“I’m sorry to have disturbed you, sir,” she replies. “I have a rare condition such that when I sneeze, I have an orgasm.”
The man, now feeling badly, says, “Oh, I’m sorry. What are you taking for it?”
The woman looks at him with a coy smile and says, “Pepper.”
**************************
King Arthur was in Merlin’s laboratory where the good wizard was showing him his latest invention. It was a chastity belt, except it had a rather large hole in the most obvious place.
“This is no good, Merlin!” the king exclaimed, “Look at this opening. How is this supposed to protect m’lady, the Queen?”
“Ah, sire, just observe,” said Merlin. He then selected his most worn out wand, one that he was going to discard anyway. He inserted it in the gaping aperture of the chastity belt whereupon a small guillotine blade came down and cut it neatly in two.
“Merlin, you are a genius!” said the grateful monarch. “Now I can leave, knowing that my Queen is fully protected.”
After putting Guinevere in the device, King Arthur then set out upon his Quest.
Several years passed until he returned to Camelot. Immediately he assembled all of his knights in the courtyard and had them drop their trousers for an informal “short arm” inspection.
Sure enough, each and every one of them was either amputated or damaged in some way. All of them, except Sir Galahad.
“Sir Galahad,” exclaimed King Arthur. “My one and only true knight! Only you among all the nobles have been true to me. What is it in my power to grant you? Name it and it is yours!”
But, alas, Sir Galahad was speechless.
*******************************
A man wearing a stovepipe hat, a fake beard, and a waistcoat sits down at a bar and orders a drink.
“Goin’ to a party?” the bartender asks.
“Yeah,” the man replies, “I’m supposed to go dressed as my love life.”
“But you look like Abe Lincoln.”“That’s right. My last four scores were seven years ago.”
Three
I lay on my tummy, legs together and pussy clenched, as Rick kisses my neck and shoulders before wetting the tip of his dick and sliding it between my tightly held together lips.
I relax enough to let him in and then squeeze again with all my might.
One thrust. He holds on to me tightly, hands reaching beneath me and cupping my breasts.
Two thrusts. Hes breathing hard and sighing, his breath whooshing past my ear and landing on my cheek, the heat of him making me want him more.
Three thrusts. This one is hard and purposeful, rammed as deeply as he can, me still tightly contracted around him. Then I feel it. I feel his cock pulsing, emptying into me and his body shakes and contented moans flutter off his lips.
Three thrusts and its always over when I receive him that way. No more, no less. Three. Just enough to make me want more, and just enough to satisfy him for the night.
Tell me....
Would you be willing to give up sex for five years if you could have wonderfully sensual and erotic dreams any night you wished? (that would work out really well for those of us who have intense orgasms with their sexual dreams...)
Case Closed
Needless to say, I'm disappointed that my requests to behave were ignored. I hope everyone's got the nasties out of their system, because I don't want to talk about any of this nonsense anymore. Please respect this decision.
Also, Rick knows about this blog, I thought I made that very clear. I told him about this blog the very day I set it up, only minutes later. He chooses not to read it because hes simply not interested. I don't hide it from him at all though. And he knows all about the Bob/Greg mess too.
I'm very comfortable in the fact that we would have no problems should Rick begin to read my blog. I say this being the person who knows him best.
I do agree though, that this past time should not be a secret from your spouse or loved one, for the very reason that we've all been buzzing about.
Now, enough of this!
xoxo
 Less than one week left to vote, don't make me bust out the duct tape and the paddle! ;) http://www.blogmechanics.com/bob/vote.php?pollID=18
Surreal Life
I'm not a big fan of reality tv, but in a morning/noon/night sickness induced laziness, I caught the new seaon premiere of the Surreal Life Sunday night. Holy shit! Never felt more sane in all my life!
They get Verne Troyer, mini me from Austin Powers, drunk off of his ass, and then he starts hitting Christopher Knight, Peter Brady from the Brady Bunch, before he finally passes out and Chris has to carry him to bed. He looked like a strung out toddler being carried off.
Then he starts this creepy moaning shit, and before you know it, hes naked on his little scooter, pissing in the corner of the common room! Creepy. Creepy. Creepy.
Da Brat has this funny idea that she doesn't belong on the show because its a show for "has beens" of which shes not. Somebody send the girl a clue.
Chyna Doll, you know the creepy drag queen looking ex WWE wrestler, acts strung out on drugs and is clearly the shit disturber in the show. Well, that and Verne with his little dog syndrome attitude.
What an interesting ensemble of stars. And creepy!
Bad Behavior
I woke up yesterday morning to Rick hugging me tightly and whispering in my ear, "Babydoll, I think I'm going to be bad."
"What?," I asked in my sleepy haze, wondering what he was referring to.
"I overslept. I think I'm going to call in and spend the day at home with you." He said this while kissing my neck and carressing my thigh, trying to sweet talk his way out of a lashing for missing work.
"Okay, I answered," obviously surprising him with my response. "But you're in trouble."
"Thats okay, I like being in trouble." And he jumped out of bed to phone in.
When he returned, he tried to crawl back into bed to snuggle.
"No. Get up," I instucted him. He did.
I pulled the covers off, tossing them aside and spread my legs for him. "Eat me."
He slipped between my knees and got to work. I lay there lazily, allowing his mouth to bring me to orgasm. He tried to use his fingers, but I stopped him. "Just your mouth." And he obeyed.
"Rub your dick on my pussy," I told him, and enjoyed the sensation of his hardness teasing my swollen lips, wetting his head with a mixture of my juices and his kisses. I reached down and directed him where to rub me, near my clit, enough to bring more waves of pleasure before I sat up and said, "Now fuck me from behind."
Climbing up on my hands and knees, he soon held my hips in his hands and thrust himself into me. I could feel my wetness seeping from my hole as he slapped his pelvis against my sex.
"Mmmmm...Yes! Thats good!"
Harder and faster, deeper and wetter until he finally came, filling me with his seed.
"I like being in trouble," he reminded me as he nuzzled back under the covers. And I certainly don't mind handing out the punishment!
I won't lose sleep over missing it. ;)
I own a video that lets you choose camera angle, visit Comstock Films in my links to find out more. It is a neat novelty, which I'm sure will be used in other films soon.
Hmmmmm.....
Okay, I tempararily had my comments turned off while I thought about how to handle a situation thats suddenly arised. Thinking that through, doesn't seem to help or really, to hurt anything other than those of you who'd like to leave their wonderful comments as usual.
No, I didn't get an inappropriate email or comment left on my site. Thank you for those concerned about me and who asked what happened.
As you were. ;)
xoxo
Let it snow, let it snow, let it snow!
We had unexpected snow yesterday. Typical weather prediction, of a little bit of rain overnight and temps in the fifties by Saturday afternoon. Well, I couldn't believe it, but the weather man was wrong!
I kneeled on the big chair in our bedroom that sat against the window and watched as the big, fat, fluffy flakes fell on the already white blanket covering the grass that only earlier was a muddy mess from the dreary rain filled days we had been plagued with all week. It was beautiful.
"Look at all the snow," I said as I heard Rick come into the bedroom.
He stood behind me, glancing out the window and rubbing my ass with his hand as he admired the wintry scene. Moments later, I felt him lift my night shirt and shove his cock deep into my pussy.
I gasped with surprise and watched as the neighbors pulled into their driveway next door, wondering if they could see us. Well, I knew they could, I suppose I wondered if they would.
His hands massaged my shoulders and back muscles as he pumped in and out of me.
"What if they see us?" I ask him.
"What? They'll see me rubbing your back," he answered as he continued to fuck me.
"But if you're worried....." he pulled out and headed into the bathroom.
"Where are you going?," I asked, now sorry that I had said anything.
"To take a quick shower. Be good, and I'll finish what I started later."
Those words were nothing, if not perfect inspiration to be on best behavior.
No, its not Hump Day....
But heres a spicy little tale staring yours truly anyway. Enjoy!
What should have happened......
I've told you that his writing was fabulous, and heres just a tiny snippet of his imagination. Love it!
Curious...
How is it that the clothed cleavage shot is getting more praise than the nude breast shot? Just wondering. lol
Voting
Alot of people emailed me asking how often you can vote for the BoB Awards. You can vote every 24 hours up untill January 17. Click here to go vote. I really do appreciate your support. Thank you!
xoxo
Hump Day!
" Gone on business to the islands, miss me as I sip margaritas from the beachfront view of the Regent Resort."
She read and reread that snarky post as she twirled her fingers through her hair and laughed. Closing the laptop, she stood up and stretched with feline grace before admiring the beachfront view he spoke of.
Another giggle escaped her as she pondered the likliehood of them actually being in the same place at the same time. How dangerous that could be! And yet, ever so titalizing....
Delicious thoughts pranced through her mind as she dropped her robe and pulled a bikini out of the perfectly organized hotel dresser drawer. Today could prove to be rather interesting.
***
Bob was happy to volunteer for the business seminar as soon as he heard the tropical destination of the event. The business would be short, and he would still have time to soak up the sun and relax a bit before heading back home. Definitly a win win situation, in his opinion.
Having slept well on the plane ride down, he was well rested and eager to set foot on the beach. A quick change and he was in his swim trunks and headed to the sandy oasis that awaited him.
***
She could feel the desk boy's eyes on her as soon as she entered the lobby. She smiled, watching him visibly gulp at the sight of her in that tiny black bikini, nipples protruding through the thin fabric from the coldness of the air conditioning.
"Chilly in here, isn't it?" She raised her eyebrows and watched his eyes dart from her tits to her eyes and back several times before he finally looked away and answered.
"Maybe a little," he said, "I guess I'm just used to it." His eyes glanced at her nipples once more before he asked how he could be of assistance to her.
"Well," she began, leaning closer to him as she pulled a pen out of his shirt pocket and reached behind the counter. He jumped back a little and adjusted his throbbing erection through his pants as he wondered what she was doing.
"Just wanted a post it," she grinned as he attempted to hide his hardness behind the reservation book he quickly picked up.
She wrote down a name and slid the paper to him. "Has a man by this name checked in here recently?"
Picking up the slip of paper, he replied, " I'm really not supposed to share that sort of information." He watched the disappointment appear on her face and then added, "But I'm sure you wouldn't do anything bad with that information, right? Hes a friend of yours?"
"Yes, of course. A friend. I wouldn't do anything bad..."
He looked around before leaning close and saying, "He just headed out to the beach about two minutes before you came in here. Hes wearing red trunks and headed out to the deserted southern section of the beach. Shouldn't be anyone else out there this time of day."
Armed with his description, she was off to find her 'friend'.
***
It was a gorgeous day, and the section of beach was just as deserted as the desk boy had said it would be. In the distance, she could finally see a person in a lounge chair, soaking up the sun. As she got even closer, she saw the red trunks and for a moment, felt a bit nervous.
That soon passed and before long she was only a few feet away from him.
"Mr Jacques?"
He opened his eyes and looked quizzicaly at the woman that stood before him, wondering how she knew his name.
"Mr Jacques, I hope you have sunscreen on! The sun is very strong down here, and even darker complected people tend to burn more easily."
Bob took in the beauty that stood before him, assuming that she must work for the resort if she knew his name. Maybe it was her job to check on the guests on the beach? Regardless, he had no intention of sending his beach bunny away so quickly.
"I really rarely ever burn," he said, "but, of course, if you say I need sunscreen, then I believe you."
At this, she smiled and reached into her bag before tossing it aside. "Good. I'd hate to see you start your trip off with an uncomfortable sunburn." Her eyes glanced over his body, admiring him as she opened up the bottle of sunscreen. "Roll over," she directed him.
"Roll over?" he thought to himself. "Shes going to grease me up herself?!" He watched as she poured some lotion in her hands and came closer to him. "Okay, deep breath, its probably just her job." And with that, he obeyed her command and rolled over onto his belly, eagerly awaiting her touch.
She started with his legs, kneading the creamy mixture into his skin. As she got closer to the bottom of his trunks, she reached in just a little, extending the lotion line for full protection. He jumped in surprise when he felt her fingers glide beneath his shorts. "Just don't want to miss a spot," she said.
Another squirt into her hand and she straddled his back to reach his shoulders and backs of his arms, ass resting on his. She felt him clench his buttocks as he again seemed to jump in surprise beneath her, and then felt him relax, releasing the clenched muscles as he grew used to her presence.
"This is one hell of a service," Bob thought to himself as he felt himself stirring in his shorts. He felt her stand up, and then ask him to roll over. He hesitated for a moment, trying to will his 'excitement' away to no avail. "Shes probably used to seeing that," he told himself, "Its perfectly normal, and she probably won't even notice."
As he turned onto his back, she couldn't help but notice the very thing he prayed she wouldn't. She made no deal out of it as she began rubbing the fronts of his legs, again creeping just slightly into his shorts to extend the lotion line. Being so close to his object of concern, only made it that much more obvious, as it jumped at her touch. He briefly thought of sitting up and offering to finish lathering on the sunblock himself, but his lips wouldn't let him say the words. Just as he wondered if she would straddle him again to reach his shoulders and chest, she did just that, her ass and pussy resting ontop of his pulsing cock.
He watched those full lips of hers smile as she massaged his skin and then held his head in her hands as she ran her fingers over his face. "Don't want to miss a spot," she said. She watched as his gorgeous blue eyes closed, and his mouth let out a sigh. She could feel him throbbing against her sex, making her pussy wet and eager for more. He seemed receptive to her touch, but maybe she was just imagining his interest.....
He felt her begin to get up and grabbed her hand as she stood above him.
"Wait, I think you missed a spot," he said, watching for approval in her expression. She smiled and cocked her head to the side as he pulled his trunks down, freeing his bobbing cock.
"Oh my," she answered, his hand pulling her closer to him. She sat on his abdomen as he reached behind her back and untied the strings to her top, full, heavy breasts falling free from the thin material. Where she sat, he thought he could feel her dampness, and this excited him.
His hands cupped her breasts, thumbs circling the nipples before he pulled her down close enough to take the flesh into his mouth. At this, she moaned.
His fingers walked down her sides and rested on her hips before tugging at the strings that held her bikini bottom in place. As the fabric fell limp, she lifted herself enough for him to pull it out from between them. A finger slipped into her slit, verifying the wetnes he had thought he felt, and with that, she lifted her bottom and sat heavily on his dick, forcing the full length deep into her pussy.
"Ohh!" they both moaned, and he gripped her ass cheeks in his hands, helping to pull her up and down his shaft. As she rode him, he watched her breasts bouncing up and down, pulling her close enough to tease her nipples with his teeth as she squeezed her walls tightly against his dick.
After several minutes, he held her firmly into place before adding, "Lets switch places."
He lay her down on the lounge chair and kneeled between her legs, tongue slipping between her lips and tasting her honey. His lips moaned, vibrating against her clit and nearly throwing her into an orgasm. Her fingers ran through his dark hair, massaging his scalp as encouragment to keep snacking on her.
Slipping a finger into her cunt and making circles with his tongue around her pulsing rosebud, soon had her erupting into waves of pleasure, pussy juice filling his mouth before he quickly rammed his cock into her, still feeling the contractions of her climax around him.
He pumped her, holding her ankles high in the air and watching his dick disappear into the pretty little box below him as she squeezed her nipples and purred with pleasure. He felt the familiar churning as his cock prepared to explode and pulled out, erupting on her tummy and tits, watching as she rubbed the cream into her flesh.
He collapsed onto his back in the sand, amazed at the events that just occurred.
She found her bikini pieces and held onto them before crawling over to him and nibbling on his ear as she whispered, "Bobby, darling, I giggled when I saw that snarky message on your blog and realized that we would be in the same place at the same time."
His eyes stared at her in disbelief as he suddenly realized who he was lying next to.
She leaned down and kissed his mouth before standing up and waving goodbye, bikini in her hand, walking down towards the resort naked. His eyes never left the butterfly tattoo on the small of her back as she dissappeared out of sight.
 Gratuitous cleavage shot.
Save the Children
Obviously, the Tsunami disaster is a HUGE tragedy, the number of lives lost sickening. Through all the footage, what kills me the most is seeing the children who were affected, making pleas for their parents to contact them if they are still alive. So many people died, so many children were killed.
Its not much, but Rick and I donated $5000 to Save the Children. Of course, these organizations need help and funding year round, not just in times of severe crisis.
It feels good to help, but it doesn't take away the lump in my throat.
Tell me....
What do you most strive for in your life: accomplishment, security, love, power, excitement, knowledge, or something else?
Best Of Blog Awards
I have to say, I was really surprised that I was even nominated, so imagine my disbelief when I made it to the final ten.
Thank you, thank you, thank you to everyone who has voted for and continues to vote for this humble little blog. If you want to know where to vote, click here. Voting ends January 17.
You guys sure know how to make a girl blush. ;)
xoxo
I went to bed Saturday night too tired for sex. Rick was definitely feeling amorous, but I couldn't keep my eyes open. Instead he held me, kissed my forehead and dozed off with me.
Sunday morning, I woke up missing what I had to forfeit the night before. I cuddled up close to Rick who was laying flat on his back. My hand massaged his thigh and the crease between his thigh and mound of pubic hair. He let out a few sighs and wiggled around, letting me know he enjoyed the attention.
I refrained from touching his shaft, only barely, lightly touching it every now and again as I massaged his leg and balls intermittenly. I knew I was getting him worked up, I could feel it.
His hand traced the lines of my back, using pressure as I got closer to his pulsing dick to try to persuade me to pay attention to it. I continued ignoring it until he sat up and forced my head down in his lap, his cock plunging deep into my mouth and throat, causing tears to escape the corners of my eyes from the stretch.
His hand held on to my hair and kept me in position as I sucked him, spit glistening off of him.
Finally, he pulled me between his legs, my breasts heavy and swaying against his swelled member. His hands quickly grabbed my flesh and wrapped it around him, the spit serving as lubrication as I moved back and forth, my tits a pseudo pussy.
He was really into it, moaning and making pleasured faces I hadn't seen before. I fought the urge to sit on him, to ride him into climax, and instead continued to thrust his cock between my cleavage, always watching his gorgeous expression, and every now and then, sucking his head as it popped up close to my lips.
His breathing quickened and I knew he was going to come soon as his hands gripped my flesh even tighter and I sped up my movements to match his own small thrusts.
Come exploded through my tits, on my neck, my hair, everywhere. I leaned down and lapped up the puddle that gathered on his tummy before giving his cock one final kiss.
He smiled and looked at the mess he had made of me as I stood up and smiled back, headed to the shower to clean up, the taste of him still fresh on my lips. Almost a shame to wash it away...
 Thank you for all the e-cards and birthday well wishes! I had a wonderful birthday and am enjoying time with Rick on his rare weekend off. Hope everyone had a fantastic holiday! xoxo
|
